I Yield

I know Papa tells me that

"though I passs through the shadow of death,He is with me".

However, this 'shadow' is too much for me Lord.

I can't remember having this contract with you.

I know I can trust you but Paps, it's all too much and confusing.

Guess I have nothing else to do but to continue to trust you because, it all doesn't add up.

But, then, you have actually taught me that when it doesn't add up, You are in the equation.

So, Papa, though the equation looks rather erronous -due to my short-sightedness,

You tell me that the result at the end of the 'shadow' is a function of You being in the equation....

So, Paps, I yield to You.

Love is...

Love is Intoxicating
Love is Magnificent
Love never dies...
...it is everlasting
Love is You.

A Lover's Note...

DEDICATION:


TO A RARE TREASURE...

...A WONDERFUL FRIEND...

TO A FAB. PERSON WHO HAS A PERMANENT PLACE IN MY HEART...

...U 'R A CHERISHED JEWEL WHO IS WORTH MORE THAN ICE. LISTENING LOVE IS CONFIDENTIAL. IT SAYS I WON'T BETRAY YOU. THE SECRETS WE'VE SHARED ARE LOCKED IN MY HEART. U ALONE KNOW THE COMBINATION.

...U 'R LOVED TODAY N' ALWAYS...

THE NOTE

Mon amour,

I guess its time to say this. Its good to know that you've made up part of my memories -warm memories which will forever be cherished by me.

Thinking back to the very first time I heard your name, to me, you were only that bloke on the other side. I had no feeliings until we started saying 'hi'. Well, then, I thought you were a big time feeler trying to make an impression. I was suprised when you told me the picture -my picture. I couldn't think of any reason why you would've been attracted to me 'cos, I'm positive that there are so many babes at your end. Anyways, I'm really honoured.

On the other side, what attracted me to you isn't quite clear to moi. It might be your straight-forwardness, your sense of humour or, your voice. I guess it's your voice. You might not have noticed but...(confession). I had and still have a crush on your voice.

Moving on, I found out that you were great company. You became my friend, my confidant,my 'mini'-mentor,my prince-charming and my world; all in all, you've become my everything and everyday, I give thanks I found you. I believe there's a reason for things turning out this way.

No matter what happens, you'll always be in my heart and I don't think I'll forget you -unless I have amnesia (Heavens forbid). In other words, you'll always be a part of me. I hope you feel the same way.

At times, I wonder if I'm under the influence of a spell 'cos, this time last year, if I was told I'll fall for some guy I've never seen and write such a note as this for him, I'll tell the informer to visit a Shrink. But voila! someone up there has a way of turning our greatest fears into our greatest pleasure. I can't believe I actually daydream of us together....can you beat that! day-dreaming about a guy who has no face. It was kinda weird but very enjoyable. I remember the day I told you I love you; that felt really good. I realised that it hurts to love someone and not be loved in return but, what is more painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let that person know how you feel. I'm happy I told you about how I felt and I don't think I'll ever regret it.

I love everything about you. Your soothing voice, your sense of humour, your 'strokes' and 'psyches' and most of all, those beautiful psalms of yours. All your psalms really touched me and I'm very grateful for them. You are the first guy I know who's not a relative that has inspired me positively. Thanks for being there and thanks for the support given. Sweetheart, you mean a lot to me and it pains me deeply that sometimes i just go my own way... lets wait to see what destiny has in store for us.

One thing is for sure, I really like your truthfulness. You always said "the fact" and I really appreciate that. Thanks for those little words; you might not have noticed but they really went a long way. Really I wish we had met face to face and we are closer than what we are now so we would have had some much more wonderful memories to cherish...what do you think? It really touches me when I think of how much you care and how concerned about me you were. On the night of the 24th of May at about 19:30hours, when you 'implied' that I didn't care, it really,really hurt me and I started thinking that maybe you were right. I don't think I deserve you. You are a good person with a good heart... you've got lots to be grateful for.

Mehn, I remember those terribly horrible day when my phone couldn't call out. For me, those days were like nightmare. I always felt distant but,what actually fascinates me is the fact that we keep talking practically everyday and I don't get tired or bored of you. Instead, I eagerly anticipate the next call... I was so pathetic. I also remember those days I got kinda sentimental on the phone and I thought gosh! I just ruined your days, I'm sorry about that. My love, even though some of the stuff we shared during our tete-a-tete was mushy and all, I still feel it was worth it. You always made my day.

Keep this at the back of your mind:

It took me one minute to get a crush on you, an hour to like you very much, a day to fall in love with you, but seventy times seven lifetimes may come and go, I'll never forget you 'cos you'll always be in my heart.

I loved you, I love you and I'll always love.

EPILOGUE

My Darlin' Son,

On a realistic note, I sent you to the world with nothing and when you leave, you'll leave with nothing. I guess all you can do is leave behind memories of what we shared and by trying,leave good impressions on the people you leave behind. Love is a lot more than a warm frizzy feeling. In my opinion, it is being completely committed to someone the heart finds precious. You are very precious to me. You have got MY heart; and wings hiding somewhere. My darling, though I can do all things without you ('cos I'm the creator of the universe) yet,I don't know what I could have done without you. Thank you for being such a blessing and I'm truly grateful. Your laughter always made me happy. Your voice alone was enough to initiate an excitement in me. You mean the world to me, I really admire you. You have no idea how special you are,caring,talented and blessed you are. I'm thanking you,very much, for caring for me. Remember 'I'm yours to the end of time'. I may not be with you in person but in Spirit, and be certain that someone out there loves and cares for you deeply.

I just want to let you know that no matter how much people may try to get you down, don't let it upset you. I will be with you through it all. Just remain the level-headed hunk I know. I want you to know that every single moment I spent talking to you will always be cherished and your memories will go on.

Keep this at the back of your mind:

I took my time to create you; took me no time to get a crush on you; took me no hour to like you very,very much;took me no day to fall in love with you and, while I'm not bound by any lifetime,I not forget you 'cos, you were in my mind before you were created and you will always be on my mind

...Remember what I did on the cross? It all about my love for you!!!

My Precious, stay very close to me in all you do. I am a faithful God and I'll never leave nor forsake you. I, your God, love you more than you can imagine and I won't let go of you. My arms are wide open pleading with you to come but I won't push nor pull you. So, it's up to you to open the door of your heart and let me in.

All my love.

I AM.

Thoughts of You

I rejoice and my heart is gladened
I throw all my burdens down
When thinking about you.

My soul is pleased and made whole
Life's trouble;away its blown
When thinking about you.

The thought of you...
...brings me happiness
The thought of you...
...subdues my sadnness
The thought of you...
...keeps me through the nights-

-Thinking about you
is the only thing that makes me shine bright.

The Lovers' Fate.

The moon has ascended between us
Between two pines
That bow to each other;
Love with the moon has ascended
Has fed on our solitary stems
And we are now shadows
That cling to each other
But the kiss the air only.

Life's Miracle

"Once brought into life
the birth of two beings far apart"
Like young babies
they grew and as life would tell,
that knowing each other is a miracle.

Life itself is a miracle
-and in it is miracle.
A miracle of having to know someone
you care for and love.
Someone so striking you cannot resist.
A loved one full of compassion
A loved one to friendly to be left alone
A loved one so hardworking
-inspiring me to be too.
A loved one who smiles and I'm uplifted
A loved one who is all in all.

Once brought into life
the birth of two beings far apart
And as life would tell,
that knowing each other is a miracle.

YHWH

I have thought of ways to start this.
So many are the styles I have considered to introduce you
Yet you say
I AM THAT I AM.


What does that mean?
I began to study that name and I realise it's not even a name...
...Its your state of being in each individual's life.
It's your degree of existence in each person's life...
...You are too vast to be limited by a NAME!!!
Then I remember...
YHWH.


You are my God with the unpronouncible name
My God of ephizzy...
...the One that likes to show-off sometimes.
The One who knows the End even before the Beginning
(The Alpha and Omega, that is).
You are the God that exists within Himself
The Unchanging Changer or, shall I say the Unchangeable Changer?
You are the One with the Potter's touch.
One who speaks and the words from His mouth are quickened.
The lion of the tribe of Judah.
The burning flame that burns not.



He is the only wise God and the Wise and only God.
The One without sin yet, went to hell just for me!!!
I love you Papa
You are soo incomprehensible yet, very simple to understand
He says "Just remember, I AM THAT I AM".
Oh!, that's still rather incomprehensible.
Your complexity seems to exist in your simplicity
My limitless God abiding in my limited body
Hence my capacity, limitless.


How I love you so!
My Father and my Friend
My Lord and my Shepered
My Light and my Salvation
My God and my King.
My YHWH.

Ode to Ron

A wise one
Is he who recognises opportunities.
He takes the opportunities and makes success out of it.

A wiser one
Is he who appreciates a friend...
...a friend that motivates.
He sees the doors opened by the friend and makes use of them.

My wise friend,
You have been a source of motivation
You have been a door opener.
You satisfy the word Best!
I am definitely making use of the door you have opened
Getting the job done, Ron.

Travellers' Light

Cold be Heart and Hand and Bone
Cold be Travellers far from Home

When Sun has failed and Moon is Dead
They do not see what lies Ahead.

In Him is Life and the life is Light
Lo! He comes; the Night lost Might

In Him is Light, the light we Trust
He is Christ, nailed to the Cross.

Cure of Love

Love means many things to many people
But to me,
Love is a sickness
Which only she can cure.

Her name is...

She knocked on his door with a gentle smile
So commonly like an acquaintance.
He told himself, “She is naught but company”.
Yet, their friendship became more intense

First he said it was nothing he could not control…
…his mind and soul he would withhold.
He told himself, “I am the commandant of the situation”
But, they became so close; she had become part of his life’s daily dose.

He thought he was smart enough
Never to be a victim of her cunning behaviour.
Thought he was well prepared…
…well enough to resist her demeanour
But before he could get a hold of this relationship
He had gradually but indeed, yielded his heart to her lordship;

But how could she do that?
Slowing but steadily tabernacle in his heart?

Son!
That’s all she ever does
That’s what she is known for.
Such a Con!

A child’s name influences his personality and destiny,
So the old adage says.
What did he expect from her, really?
When he knows!
Her name is…Sin

A Heavy Heart

Only one path she had always known.
A path that follows a prophet...
...A warrior.

In him she was bred

Him alone

She had always known.

But you say you were there?

Yes!

To her, I know you called out

And to you,she did not come

But, fault her not
For, you brought her forth
Into the Warrior’s path.
In the Warrior’s path she had been groomed...
...never to depart from it.
How then can it be?
That in the end of days
She is still judged!

Some say we get to a point
And, it’s down to our choice.
But I say,
We get to a crossroad
And it’s down to our conviction

A conviction in our heart
That we are treading on the right path.

Oh! I mourn.
Yes, Lord, I mourn.
My heart is heavy
For I know not her destination.
I yearn for answers, Daddy
For, I am engulfed in confusion.

Harken to my cry, O Lord!
For confusion is not my promised portion.
You say you will give me peace.
Yes!
You said it.
Your peace, which passes all understanding
You say, will guide my heart and mind.
So, like you said to the storm,
Say to my heart;
Peace, be still.

You say I should come to you
I, heavily laden

And, to my burden
You will put a laying.

Here I am
My YHWH
Relieve me of my plight
For I have come
With a heavy heart.